Elly is a 25-year-old graphic designer who lives in Queen West. She says, “My style has been called ‘grandma-chic,’ but I suppose it’s a little boho, retro, and classic hipster, too.” She describes herself as fun-loving, easygoing, and hardworking, and likes going to concerts, art galleries, and out for drinks. Elly met Max through a friend.
I liked Max because he was creatively minded like me. He seemed like he was the life of the party, always having fun. A mutual friend vouched for him, and eventually, Max asked me out via text message. I was excited, because after getting out of a five-year relationship, I had been single for about six months and hadn’t maintained a very regular dating life.
At my suggestion, we planned to get some food and go see an exhibit at the AGO with some other friends—to really make a day of it. I love art galleries and museums. I was also excited to hang out with Max and my friends, so I could test the waters with him in a more comfortable, casual situation.
We met up for lunch first. The conversation was fine: It was mostly small talk, nothing riveting. He was being a little negative about the whole gallery thing. I did my best to be enthusiastic, but he didn’t do much to try and match that. I had to remind myself that this was probably normal behaviour for single guys.
In the middle of the meal, Max said he would rather go to a movie than the exhibit. He said he was a really big movie fan, but not in the artsy “I like to watch black-and-white movies and drink wine” kind of way—more like in the “Let’s watch Borat! Best movie ever!” kind of way. Sigh. I was between apartments at the time, and was staying outside of the city, so I thought to myself, “I didn’t come all the way downtown just to see a movie.” I also didn’t want to spend our first meeting staring at a screen in silence, to be honest.
I felt awkward, and said something about how my friends were already planning to meet us, and how we’d essentially be bailing on them. He disregarded that, and said that he’d decided we’d go to a big action movie that was playing nearby. He didn’t seem to care what I wanted to do. I guess I was a bit of a pushover in the whole situation, because I agreed. I didn’t know how else to salvage the date at that point.
By then, we were already late for the AGO, so I just said, “Fine,” and then texted my friend about the change. We went Dutch on lunch and the movie. The whole time we were in the theatre, one of my friends was texting me—she was very upset that we hadn’t joined them.
After the movie, Max kissed me goodnight, and that was that. I knew I wouldn’t go out with him again. Having my plans hijacked for an action movie isn’t my idea of a good time.
Elly rates her date (out of 10): 1
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