This week’s top happenings include Vag Halen at the Rhubarb Festival Kick-Off Bash, Doldrums at Wavelength Music Festival, and much more.
Thursday: Love A Heart, a bachelor/bachelorette auction
The Hideout Toronto, 484 Queen St. W. $5 at the door or online. Doors at 8 p.m, auction at 9:30 p.m.
Hey, do you want to finally make your move on that hottie you’ve been Twitter-stalking? Well, I’ll get you one step closer. Tonight, local Twitter somebody Shannon Hunter will mount the third annual Love A Heart bachelor/bachelorette auction, an event that’s raised over $20,000 over the last two years for the Heart and Stroke Foundation. Although past auctions have included people like George Stroumboulopoulos and Argos wide receiver Mike Bradwell, this edition features many more “real people” who might actually give you good dates. Actually, to keep it real, the guy choices are crazy-hot this year. If I had to advise you ladies—in terms of Grade A beef—I would say snap up my BF Michael Nus (@MichaelNus) first, followed by Kerry Morrison (@kmore), Jeremy Elder (@ShapeAndColour), and Jesse Ship (@jesse_ship). I went to the first one, and it got a little cray with all the people whoring themselves out for charity—good times. Complete details here.
Friday: Silent Shout: Doldrums album release edition
With various performers. Double Double Land, 209 Augusta Ave. $5. Doors at midnight.
Now here’s a realistic, late-night banger. From Feb. 14 to 17, Wavelength Music Festival is celebrating its lucky 13 with “a four-night live curated mixtape of the best independent music in the Canadian music community in 2013.” On Friday, 23-year-old electronic wunderkind Doldrums will perform alongside Cadence Weapon, Blue Hawaii, Blonde Elvis, and Thighs at The Great Hall. (Buy tix here.) But I’m even more stoked for the post-party, co-hosted by local music blog Silent Shout, which will celebrate Doldrums’ album release alongside a night of sweaty, sweet nothings. Find out more here.
Saturday: Toronto Decompression—Beyond B’ak’tun, a Burning Man event
With various performers. Moskito + Bite, 423 College St. $25 advance online, $30 at the door. Doors at 10 p.m.
Burning Man, the legendary Nevada desert festival of art and music, is a straight-up pilgrimage for free-spirits, so much so that it formed part of the inspiration behind a Toronto filmmaker’s recent documentary about the DJ scene. On Saturday night, Beyond B’ak’tun will bring a little bit of that magic touching down in Toronto. Decompression, then, “is, at its simplest, a reunion. But more significantly, it is a powerful way to bring Burning Man inspiration to our hometown.” Here’s the deal: a Burning Man information centre, gifting table, workshops (2 p.m., free!), large-scale and interactive art, plus the big after-dark jam featuring two rooms and a handful of DJs, plus live band MiNETA, an optical illusion (see below). Plus, there will be a collection of food donations at the door on behalf of the food bank. This is one of those jams that proves music is a way of life. Find out more here.
Monday: Yelp Drinks, a week of happy hour specials
Various locations. Door times vary. Free to attend.
“Drink up, Hogtown!” is something I always like to hear. Starting Monday, Yelp will attempt to rid you of the post-V-Day/winter blues with a week-long series of specials at various downtown bars, under the umbrella of Community Manager Yelp Events. Here’s the breakdown on a few food and drink specials: Family Day Monday is Parkdale perfection with $5 burgers and pints at the Gladstone Hotel (starting at 6:30 p.m.) followed by $5.65 pints at the Cadillac Lounge (starting at 8 p.m.); College Street Bloody Tuesday includes $3.50 bloody caesars at Hadley’s and 25%-off whiskey flights and $5 Steam Whistle pints at The Caledonian; and the whole thing finishes on Saturday with $5 tapas, seasonal cocktails and Stonehammer brews at 3030, our favourite Junction haunt. Find out full details, start time and RSVP info here.
Wednesday: The 34th Rhubarb Festival Kick-Off Bash
With various performers. Buddies in Bad Times Theatre, 12 Alexander St. Wednesday to Sunday evening passes $20; one-to-one performances, PWYC; mobile works, free.
On Wednesday, Buddies in Bad Times Theatre will mount the 34th Rhubarb Festival, an explosion of queer creativity and next-level connections among the community, where art is real and real is therapy. The premise: “For two weeks, over 100 local and international artists transform Buddies into a hotbed of creativity and experimentation, sharing new ideas in contemporary theatre, performance art, dance, and music with adventure-loving audiences.” There are 12 shows running during week one and two, with free mobile works in public spaces around the city and PWYC performances, where performers connect with an audience member intimately at the 519 Community Centre. Find the entire performance schedule here. The big opening kick-off jam happens on Feb. 20 at 10 p.m. in the Buddies Cabaret, with queer cock-rock from feminist cover band Vag Halen (see below) and tunes late into the night. Find out more here.