At last night’s seventh-annual SMUT Soiree, gossip guru Elaine “Lainey” Lui schooled 800 attendees on the benefits of dishing the dirt.
Last night, The Society and LaineyGossip co-hosted the seventh annual SMUT Soiree, which saw Toronto’s PYTs, fashionistas, and committed gossip hounds walking the green carpet at the Evergreen Brick Works to dish the dirt. For the most part, the female-dominant crowd dressed to impress, running the gamut from classic Chanel sundresses to Lululemon yoga gear. Famed celeb-spotter Elaine “Lainey” Lui—who has parlayed her website’s success into a regular eTalk gig—held court with co-host Dan Levy, giving the audience the inside scoop on all things Hollywood. While some might think a party celebrating gossip is a recipe for bad karma, we discovered five reasons why a SMUT Soiree is good for the soul:
1. Gossip is a participatory group sport
Judging by the almost 800 people who attended last night’s event (at $40 a ticket), gossip is clearly a competitive pursuit. Seasoned SMUT attendees marked their territory early in the night, nabbing seats close to the stage so as to not miss a dirty detail. And speaking of sport: One attendee grabbed the mic to ask, “Do the Olympians get frisky?” Lainey, who covered the Vancouver winter games in 2010, confirmed there’s a lot of action that occurs off-piste. To which the same (hopeful) gal replied: “So, how does one get into the Olympic Village?”
2. You get a taste of the celebrity lifestyle
Surely, part of the appeal of the SMUT Soiree is experiencing some of the perks celebrities take for granted. Prior to getting down to gossip at 8:30 p.m., the crowd milled about drinking cocktails, snacking on sliders, or hung out on couches for complimentary cosmetic touch-ups and eyelash applications, and to get their hair coiffed by some of the city’s top stylists.
Alain, who transformed my locks from drab to fab, has styled many a celeb’s hair but laughed when pressed to dish some dirt on his famous clients. “It goes in one ear… and stays there,” he assures me.
Seasoned paps from WireImage were also on hand to grab candid shots of stylish folks. And what would a celeb-inspired event be without swag bags?
3. SMUT is a family-bonding experience
Mothers and daughter dates were a theme last night. Barbara and her friend Lorna double-dated with their daughters, with whom they love sharing gossip. Barbara is a long-time reader of LaineyGossip, having gotten hooked on Lainey’s witty prose back when it was still an email newsletter. She wanted to attend the SMUT soiree with her daughter because “it’s something we can do together.”
In Dame Edna-inspired glasses and a sequenced black jacket, Bernice brought her sister and niece* along for the night—and came prepared with smutty questions: “Is Angelina having an affair with Gwen?” ( “No,” assures Lainey.)
Vancouverite Lainey bought her own mother, who is based in Toronto, to the event. Affectionately referred to as “The Squawking Chicken” on Lainey’s website, fans of the blog treated her mom as an honoured guest.
4. You’ll wise up
I got a chance to ask the queen of smut herself why she thinks gossip is good for you. Lainey didn’t hesitate in answering, “So that you’re not so naïve.” Regular readers of Lainey Gossip are au fait with the reality behind the glossy headlines, but not everyone is as clued in to the fact that celebrities are not all they appear.
Lainey gossiped earlier about the celebs’ fake 1,000-watt smiles, cheap hair weaves, secret smoking habits, precious drink demands, and their tendency to have assistants answer interview questions they can’t be bothered to tackle (often communicated by a series of complicated hand gestures). And that’s just the small stuff.
“Cheating?” echoes Lainey. “Where do we start? Shout out a name and I say ‘yes’ or ‘no.’ It’s so prevalent.”
5. You just might be able to cuddle up with Brad Pitt
Lainey casually dropped Brad Pitt’s code name—“Goldilocks”—for his stay at the swanky Ritz Carleton while in town for TIFF last year as if she were giving a child the keys to the candy store. But if you’re thinking of sidling up next to Brad, Lainey assured the crowd last night “The Brange” will be getting married—in their own sweet time. And, for now, there won’t be any more children, or any more adoptions. (So I guess Jennifer Aniston can lay off the counter-attack tabloid theatrics a while.)
CORRECTION, JUNE 28, 2012: The original version of this article misidentified some attendees and their relationships to one another; these have been corrected.
