What the star of Kenny vs. Spenny (and part owner of the new Dog & Bear pub) would eat on a perfect day. Plus, how to get into Bathurst Station for free!
Breakfast (pictured above)
Open-face egg-and-tuna-salad sandwich at The Coffee Mill Restaurant
I’ve been going there my entire life. I had a horrible nightmare once that everyone on the planet died except for me and their clientele and I had to repopulate the earth with a bunch of old Jewish women. It’s not food everyone would enjoy, but I grew up on it so I dig it. I like it because they put some egg and anchovies in the tuna salad. My mom used to do that.
$9.50. 99 Yorkville Ave., 416-920-2108.

Lunch
Jamaican patties from Bakery on the Go
The spicy Jamaican patty in Bathurst Station is the best in the city. It’s handmade, stuffed way too full, and it’s a little too mushy, but it’s gold! Make sure when you get it the edges are closed, otherwise it’s dry. It’s always nice to go there because of the hottie Catholic schoolgirls who line up for cookies. Yes, I know, I’m sick. Also, if you go to the station and tell the ticket guy in the booth you’re going to the bakery, you can sneak into the TTC for free. I’ve never paid to get into Bathurst Station. Ever! Yes, I’m also scum, but it’s the TTC.
$1.25. 819 Bathurst St., 416-536-1529.

Dinner
Bone-in rib-eye at Jacobs and Co.
I think the best dinner in the city is the monster bone-in rib-eye steak at Jacobs and Co. Sure, you’d have to sell a kidney in Chinatown or suck a wiener on the way over to the restaurant just to afford the coat check. But I think it’s the best in Canada. It’s aged perfectly with a salt crust, and they give you three different types of salt to throw on the steak as well. I’m a salt addict. It’s the one thing I’d order before getting tossed on the electric chair. The chef is a god.
$48. 12 Brant St., 416-366-0200.