With an astounding 0% rating on Rotten Tomatoes, the makers of The Smurfs movie are no doubt feeling blue.
1. Today in sad movie news: The Smurfs has a whopping 0% on Rotten Tomatoes, joining the ranks of awful movies past such as Leprechaun 2, Children of the Corn V: Fields of Terror and the 1998 parody film Plump Fiction. Come on, even Cowboys and Aliens got 43%.
2. Alex Trebek has a boo-boo after chasing a burglar out of his San Francisco hotel and breaking his Achilles tendon, prompting endless Jeopardy jokes that, let’s face it, just don’t need to be repeated here.
3. Alright, we all know ’90s nostalgia is very hip right now, but this might be going a little too far. A preview of the rave documentary Electric Daisy Carnival Experience was cancelled in L.A. last night after a DJ set before the screening spiralled into a street riot. Yeah, let’s have the rave party before we screen the rave documentary. I’m sure that sounded like a good idea at the time.
4. Capitol Hill has released this year’s 50 Most Beautiful People list. Before you roll your eyes, remember—these people are more successful and better looking than you. C’mon, I know you have a weak spot somewhere for hot Republicans.
5. Alright, this thing could take a while: 300 people have signed up to offer their two cents at Rob Ford’s executive committee meeting today. Who’s up for a sleepover?